• mom: don't eat the cookies yet, they just came out of the oven and are too hot
  • me: fire cannot kill a dragon

emberslash:

miss-jaxon-flaxon-waxon:

onwardwall:

thegingerbalrog:

my-fandom-life:

dismantlerepaired:

whereismystrawberrytart:

hikingnerd:

timelordpillbug:

follovved:

amerlcanapparel:

when she says she doesn’t send nudes

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when guys objectify women and expect them to send nudesimage

when someone asks you about your nuclear plans for russia

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When Russia sends you nudes

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I don’t know, but I’m sure Olivia Pope is on it.

twerkinshield:

embracingthemadness:

steve and bucky making up random stories from their past and convincing the other avengers that it actually happened (◡‿◡✿)

buckyraccoon:

i shouldnt care so much about 95 year olds fucking each other. 

koalatea:

true life: people like my hair more than they like me

send me a colour

Deep Red - I’m in love with you.
Red
 - I love you.
Pink
 - I think you’re cute.
Blue
 - You’re amazing.
Rose - You’re pretty
Purple
 - You’re hot.
Plum - I would fuck you.
Violet - I would date you.
Aqua - I could stay on your blog for hours.
Lavender
 - You are my tumblr crush.
Orange - I want to get to know you.
Tangerine
 - We have a lot in common.
Amber
 - I wish you would notice me.
Cream - I don’t talk to you but I really love your blog

thedeathofablog:

un-be-fucking-lievable:

prongsmydeer:

pottergenes:

james turning down every hogsmeade invitation by telling them he’s going stag

Sirius spreading a rumour that he has a cat just so when people ask him about it he can go, “Nah, I’m a dog person.”

Peter being loud so when a teacher chews him out, he can promise to be “quiet as a mouse”

Remus turning into a fucking werewolf

zaschah:

Omg, his absolute look of despair when he says no XD

hi:

me and my dog type each other messages sometimes

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nickfuckface:

parents: “u should be more active”
me: image

bewbin:

bewbin:

where is all my hate? I didnt get this famous for no hate!

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first of all how dare 

fulllblownrose:

It’s too hot *opens window* in comes 20 flies, 8 spiders, 17 daddy long legs, 50 moths, 3 dragons and 12 Jehovah’s witnesses.

dangerhamster:

oboebandgeek99:

heckacute:

If you put a bee in the freezer, it will get cold and fall asleep. After it’s asleep, put it in your mouth, but don’t eat it. Just let it sit there. It will get warm and wake up. Now you have a bee in your mouth.

Why the fuck would I do that

it’s a metaphor